I'm sitting here in the midst of two half-unpacked boxes in my office wondering where my mailing labels are and wishing I hadn't slept wrong on my shoulder.
As I contemplate these highly important, life-altering decisions, I also spend time wondering if gratitude ever comes across as genuine, especially online.
I've shared all my many woes the past few months, complained about the whole moving process, the transitional process and the moving again process. I've made it known that nothing is going our way. And yet, as I sit here, in this mess in a half-finished office (painted one of my favorite colors) I am filled with gratitude.
The real kind. Not the kind you claim to have so you don't sound ungrateful, but actual, real-life, filled to overflowing gratitude.
The other night I had dinner with a friend. Afterwards, she wanted to go to Barnes and Noble to buy a copy of A Sweethavne Summer for a friend and have me sign it. I'm always a little awkward about signing books, but I went because I love my friend and because I didn't have any children to tend to. (Hey, it's the little things that keep me going.)
We walked through the store, then rounded a corner where I saw my book on the end cap. My first thought was "Oh, yay! It's on the end cap! Look." But then when I took a step back, I saw this:
What!? That's a whole darn display!
I said, "Wait, this is all my books!" My friend Ronnie let out this squeal, which made me laugh and for a few minutes I think we sounded like two chickens cackling away. (Do chickens cackle?) We were loud, let's just say that...because while I have gotten excited many times on this journey, this was just really exciting to me.
Don't hold this next photo against me. For the love of red noses.
I have a signing scheduled with Barnes and Noble, but it's not till August 18th, and seeing this absolutely blew me away. I am still kind of reeling from it.
Is it a huge deal? Maybe not...but it filled me up with this kind of thankfulness that I just cannot explain. And if I try to explain, I'm afraid I'd sound insincere.
The other day someone left a comment on one of my old blog posts. It simply said "The ironic thing is that God isn't real." But somewhere, down in the depths of my spirit, I just know He is. Because there was a time, not all that long ago, when I felt a little bit hopeless...and now, I feel almost like an outsider, watching God work on my behalf. Answering prayers I'd prayed months ago...
Not in my timing. In His.
And I have to apologize to Him for ever doubting that he would. Because he always takes care of us.
In the little things and the big.
So I'm FULL of gratitude. Honest to God, knock my socks off gratitude...for the mighty ways he moves in my life...for the love and support you guys have shown in sharing about my books. (Do you know how big of a blessing you are?)
Anyway. I pride myself on not being sappy so I'm stopping now.
But please know, if you feel a little left out or forgotten...He hears you. And He holds you in the palm of His hand...
Don't forget to check out my giveaway...I want you to win. :)
Tomorrow I'm going to Ikea. (I just this second decided that.) Anyone have any advice on how NOT to get overwhelmed? :)