I spent the weekend seeking.
Arms open, face heavenward, asking to see a little bit more of the plan. I told God everything I wanted and all the reasons why...and then I said something that kind of surprised me.
But if it's not your will, then I don't want it.
I remember years ago, I heard a pastor tell this story about going dress shopping with his wife. I can tell you in no uncertain terms that Adam would probably never go dress shopping with me (nor would I want him to), but apparently for this couple, it worked.
She came out of the dressing room and asked what he thought of the dress.
He shrugged a little and said something along the lines of, "I'm not really that crazy about it."
I imagine there was a moment between them--that brief did I just offend her? or maybe that doesn't he think I look pretty?
She responded differently than I probably would have. She simply said, "Well, then I don't want it" and changed into the next dress.
When I heard that story, in the stubbornness of my youth, I thought "Well, geesh, how cruddy that her husband didn't ask her what she wanted...he just made that decision for her. And she went along with it!"
I think I probably told Adam I didn't ever plan on taking him dress shopping. And I hoped he would never try to tell me what to wear. (I told you I was stubborn.)
But now, years later, I see the point the pastor was trying to make.
He asked his wife later why she didn't fight him on it. She liked the dress, so why didn't she buy it? And she told him that he was the one she wanted to please...so if he didn't love it, she wanted no part of it.
And that's how we should be with God.
I have a long list of plans and hopes and dreams...but today I can truly say that as I offered them up to God, I was able to say, "I don't want any of this if it's not your plan for me."
Because his plans for us are so great. Much greater than we could ever imagine for ourselves. I've always said God puts the desires in our heart so we'll ask him for them...so we'll ask for the things he wants to give us...because he's a gentleman, and he doesn't force his will on us...
And every time he gives me something other than what I asked for (like my husband, for instance) it always turns out for the better.
God may be doing something in your life today...and it may not be what you asked for or expected. Ride the wave...on the other side of it, you'll see the reasons why. And it'll make sense. Keep your arms open and your face heavenward...